On a scale of 1 to Marginally Entertaining, I'd give it a letter grade instead.

Dear DeeAura: 
Your blog has been boring lately, and I don't even come here to read it anymore because you write about nothinggggggguuuuhhh. 
Sincerely, 
the people who might have read this, had you written something worthwhile.


I know. 


What? You wanna know about my life lately? What deep thing I've been thinking about since the last weird thing life decided to throw at me?

Huh. Too bad. I stopped all my deep thinking in late April. :) Best idea I've ever had.

...probably...

And then I started singing in this little thing called the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

Goodbye, life.

...which is so sad because facebook makes my life look like it used to be UH-MAZING.

bahaha. But no longer! These are the kinds of things showing up for all the facebook people who care these days:

This would be after at least a week of no sleep because my days included ONLY work, recording week for MoTab, and commuting. 

It was also a day after the world's worst date, and just hours before the world's most offensively boring dinner with boys who should be men by this time in their lives.

Good heavens, people. All I'm asking for is a good joke every now and again!

Ayeyaeyae. I was not created to function on this level. 

Heck no.

It's like I've been absent from my own life. 

UNACCEPTABLE.

Even the sweet special needs girl in my ward demanded to know where I've been lately as I managed to get to institute last night for the first time in...at least six weeks.

See, and then I was just too tired to explain to her that I've been around. Sort of. So I just promised her I'd do better.

THEN I try talking to guys at normal social events, and what happens?
I'm a total idiot.
There's no explanation available.
Somewhere along the way, I lost my ability to communicate verbally, let alone flirt or be witty.
I am thriving on awkwardness these days.

...which is fantastic, especially if I plan on sitting in my room watching 30 Rock for the rest of my life.

I just spent more than the acceptable 2.5 seconds actually considering what that would be like.

So anyway, then on a quick break from spreadsheets at work today (you covet my life, I know) I read through some some blog drafts lately, and this is what I found:


Reasons I should be grounded today:

Apparently I think speeding on the freeway isn't cause for getting a ticket from the crazy bad-A highway patrolman on a mission to save the world last night. Not sure why I didn't think that was gonna happen...and this will definitely cause me the most pain while I'm in Hawaii in August and can't buy that useless thing I wanted because I thought getting to the last night of MoTab choir school on time was such a BIG FRIGGIN' DEAL.


I haven't put my clothes away for three days straight.


Actually, that's a lie, because it's probably been four days. FOUR DAYS.


Just because I'm an adult doesn't mean I don't have to be responsible. FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!


My purse is a giant disaster. It has Mary Poppins capabilities, but there's really no excuse for the unadulterated chaos found within.


I'd go on and elaborate further, but then this post would turn legitimate instead of just being ridiculous. 

That was from the end of April.

Aaand this is my only excuse for not blogging.

I'll be back as soon as I have something cool, or marginally funny to report.

Go on, get along with your wildly entertaining lives already.

This message brought to you by weird BYU food, sleeping past alarm clock snooze allowance, and probably some other stuff I can't articulate because I lack verbal prowess in this moment.

How to discover what you REALLY want:

I recommend searching the ksl classifieds on an average of about once a month. One man's trash, another man's treasure, right?

Only...today as I was diligently searching for a free/cheap sweet piano on ksl, (because I finally decided it's ridiculous to not have one, but I need a pretty sweet keyboard so I don't have to hire a team of muscly men to move my legit piano every time I move, since I tend to do that pretty often. On the other hand...hello tangent...maybe I SHOULD take every excuse to have man muscle in my life. Huh. Anyway.) I somehow got sidetracked by an ad for a bicycle.

And now my world is completely changed. Uh, how am I supposed to decide between road bike, mountain bike, or beach cruiser? I mean, okay, I don't live by a beach, but how cute are THOSE bikes? But a road bike would be sweet for some summer morning rides. But I grew up riding mountain bikes, and there's something about that extreme tread on my bike that just makes me feel a little more awesome. Maybe I need all those kinds of bikes.

And a sweet piano. 

And I think I want both of those for basically free so I can still save for Hawaii in August. 

And I also want to go on a Vegas roadtrip to visit my rockstar friend Celine Dion because we've just had a long-distance relationship our whole lives and I feel like it's time to put a stop to that. 

Oh, and while we're at it, I would also like an extra Saturday each week wherein I may do whatsoever I please.

That's all. 

In another life...

My friend Brooke just told me I should quit my job and become a crafter. 

I considered it for a full 5 seconds. With a giant smile on my face.

Then reality hit, and I realized I have not yet married into vast amount of money. (and love - no gold diggers here.)

Notice I said yet. Insanely positive attitude over here.

sigh.

I guess crafting will have to wait for the extra lifetime I keep hoping to have. 

"Promise to make me laugh? Every day. "

You probably recognize the title of this blog post from the LDS blockbuster picture entitled "Legacy." 

Then again, you might not recognize it if you haven't seen it.

This movie is really super important because as an 8-year-old girl, I fell in love with the character David and decided what I wanted most in love was someone who made me laugh and who loved me like David loved Lizzie. 

I'm only 30% kidding.

That's right. As an 8-year-old, that's what I decided.

And you know what?

I've been in love a few times since then, but nobody makes me laugh the way I wanted.

So my 8-year-old self might've been onto something... ;)

That's just in case you're feeling nostalgic or curious or something.

Go to 31:00  "...And I will make ya laugh..." The accent doesn't hurt, either. haha.

and then 35:15. Yup.

So anyway. On with my story.

My friend Carla brought this to my attention last night:

After reading it and crying laugh tears, I considered texting the phone number on the ad and just asking if he were A) Single, and B) over 22. Okay, 25. Okay no...at least 27. Maybe he could be just barely older than me. 

Now I'm just being demanding. 

Creepy 40-year-old men don't write funny stuff like that, right?

But I didn't do that. I didn't contact Mr. Doug, the seller.

Because he's probably 18 and trying to go on a mission.

It's just that I confess I am highly susceptible to people who make me laugh.

Even if they go by Doug. 

"Hey Doug..." I hear that commercial in my head every time I hear that name. 

Which might be more annoying than anything else over a span of time...

So nevermind, Doug. Funny ad, though. Real real funny.

And then the other day, I came across this couple on the youtube. (It's funny to call it THE youtube, okay?)

and then...

I snickered, and then I laughed a few times.

But mostly that's what I'm talking about.

People in love should laugh like that.

Even if the dude is ridiculous. :)

So that's the end of that story.

THE END.

So then here's the P.S.:

This picture is for all the people trying to look for me in General Conference this weekend.

I'm only assigned to the Sunday afternoon session of conference this time.

But I must be there on-call, dressed, music memorized for each session in case someone doesn't show up or something.

So I'll just be there the whole time dressed in a choir robe anyway.

Which is really cool, but probably warm.

I'm joking about stuff, but I really am excited. :) 

I also purposely chose a star to signify my whereabouts rather than a circle or square.

Because stars are just prettier.

And also I think if you're 5'4" and on the back row and standing on a stool to sing on national television, you deserve a star around your face.

But that's just a first world problem, and so that's also why I used a star. 

Oh, know you not that angels are near you?

This is because I don't blog anymore.

On accident.

Okay maybe on purpose. 

It all has to do with time, I suppose...

In the literal two seconds before rehearsal started in the Conference Center yesterday, I managed to take a FANTASTIC picture of my incredible good looks, and the organ pipes. It's impressive, I know. 

These days, if I have a second to blog, I...well, I don't. 

Instead I'm memorizing music.

Or driving to Salt Lake.

Or working.

Or dragging my bum to the gym before the sun gets up.

Or putting gas in my car. (Really though...the Costco gas station almost thanked me by first name yesterday.)

I've wanted to say something so many times about what a cool experience this whole choir thing is turning out to be, but every time I start to write a facebook status or write it on the old blog, it just seems so trite. So then I'll think about texting someone like my mom or my sister, but it seems such a waste to just tell one person...plus how do I describe that in a text? 

So I just tell myself I'll write it down in my journal as soon as I get home.

But then I get home way past my bedtime, and do you think I write it in my journal?

Noooooooooooooo. :) 

Head hits pillow: zonk.

I see my roommates on Sundays (...uh...usually...)

I see other people...uh...in rehearsals? Or at work? Or never.

Sometimes I see my family on a Sunday.

But if I do that, I pay for it the whole next week with exhaustion.

They only live 2 hours away, but...I have to do it in one day, and that's 4 hours of driving, and...there are only so many hours in the day. ESPECIALLY on a Sunday.

And can I just SAY again, for the record...dating is so odd. Everybody's story starts out so happy and sweet and fun and exciting...and then...THEN. BAM. 

That's random, I know. I just find myself wondering how it all goes awry sometimes.

And how I don't really have time for the drama these days...it would completely incapacitate me, and I think that might be a problem. :)

Ha! I promise I'm not whining, but it sure sounds like it, doesn't it?

This whole early mornings/late nights thing...worth it?

100%.

In little moments. 

Like when we're in rehearsals, and singing those words just calm everything down.

"Come unto Jesus, He'll ever heed you, Though in the darkness you've gone astray. His love will find you and gently lead you from darkest night into day."

"Come unto Jesus; He'll surely hear you...Oh, know you not that angels are near you?"

The best part of singing those words last night was feeling and knowing there really were angels near, even during a rehearsal. I've felt that before, but it never really goes away. The words by themselves are nice...but there's something about singing those words, and hearing the rest of the music fit all around it so intricately and perfectly...it's in those moments I find myself able to breathe. It's in those moments I feel like I remember my Heavenly Father does love me...and that the busy schedule doesn't matter. I have had more prayers answered through music in the past month than I've ever noticed before.

"I, your Lord and Master, now become your servant. 

I who made the moon and stars will kneel to wash your feet.

This is my commandment, to love as I have loved you.

Kneel to wash each other's feet as I have done for you."

Every time we sing those words, (you should hear the arrangement...it's completely beautiful.) I just cry. Because I'm a girl? Because I'm tired? Because of life? Eh. Maybe. But mostly, I love how personal the gospel is, and how personal my relationship with my Heavenly Father needs to be...because of His love for all of us. 

I feel like I'm quieting down these days, and it's a weird phenomenon. Instead of talking to a friend or a roommate about something that's going on, I find myself thinking about it more than anything else. I don't even write about it, and I usually do. But...let's just say I'm looking forward to General Conference this weekend more than I ever have before. I'm excited to sing, but I will always love the answers I find and learning from the words of living prophets and apostles. 

The blessings just keep on coming...I'm just trying to keep up on my part, I guess. :) 

And speaking of blessings...I'm so gonna be in Hawaii in June. :) I've never been, and I'm SO excited!! Maybe if you've been, you should tell me where to go/what to do. Seriously...I'm dreaming about it. 

Blogging about blogs is what I do after Daylight Savings because it requires zero brain power, and that's the kind of stuff we should be publishing on the internet.

My title is a paragraph.

Whoops.

Whatever. In other news...

It's BEAUTIFUL outside, and I'm sitting inside, at my desk.

I've cancelled anything during the lunch hour and reserved it entirely for eating outside.

In the beautiful sunshine.

Because it's March in Utah, and it's 57 degrees outside right now.

I'm in HEAVEN.

I'm also so sleepy.

A nap might be glorious as well.

Also, I caught up on reading blogs this morning while waiting for a report to download at work.

Super multi-tasker: here.

I have a few things to say about said blog review.

Kaley refuses to post great pictures on facebook, and this is how I manage to collect pictures these days. It's quite bothersome. BOTHERSOME, Kaley. ;) So, since I can't put it on fb, I'm putting it here. Because I like it. And the people in it. This was the night Aubrey and Erik got engaged, and we were all there at the end. That was fun. This was also the night it was reiterated to me what the guys got Jason for his bachelor party, and how they should get the same thing for Erik's bachelor party. I'm still experiencing the backlash hurl-effect (yes, I just made that up) due to this particular knowledge. That happiness on my face is because it had yet to be mentioned. AGAIN. 

When I'm not completely grossed out, it's actually funny. 

No, I'm not explaining it.

Because I'd have to say what it's called, and that's half of what makes it so sick. 

Oh but how is it so funny?!

Okay, I'm done recounting stories without explanation. 

My bee-yoo-ti-ful cousin posted this recipe for Fish Tacos today, and I am SO dissatisfied with my lunch leftovers now. I want a fish taco. I'll probably make them for dinner. 

After I hit up the grocery store, of course...

DROOL.

Anything with lime and cilantro. Holy crap, yes.

Concerning March Madness: I love watching basketball. Really, I do. It's my favorite sport to watch. LOVE. But I have zero desire to win a bracket challenge. It's purely social for me; judge away. I feel bad about this for about 2.5 seconds until I realize it doesn't do anyone any harm for me to NOT care. I'm just there for the fun, and probably the food, and my fake bracket is only going to give you one less person to worry about as you strive toward your super achievement of guessing who's gonna win while the playas play.

Now everyone who cares is infuriated with my confession.

Crap. 

Pass the nachos.

And my fake bracket.

Sometimes I wonder why I blog. 

3 minutes to lunch. 

Most assuredly needs a nap.

Someday, I will get enough sleep at night again, and this will enable me to think clearly enough to organize my thoughts into cohesive, blog-worthy sentences. Because a good blog is necessary? I don't know. Whatever.

Until then, I shall dazzle you with my wit and accomplishments.

My 6 a.m. bench press is slightly more impressive than before. I say slightly because it was already impressive, of course, but I think much of the improvement comes from the fact I actually get up before dawn to do such a thing whereas before I did not. Anything one does before dawn is likely to be more impressive than at any other time of day. ...apart from eating a pan full of brownies, of course.

I almost have the Durufle Requiem (that's just my current favorite movement) memorized for the chorale concert in April. Almost. 

I finally went grocery shopping.

I discovered I desperately want a Kinect. 

I think blondes should not have giant black eyebrows unless that's really what happens to grow out of their face. 

I laughed out loud, twice, at the Oscars last night. I find this impressive especially considering I only watched them for about 20 minutes. Chris Rock made me snicker for at least a good 3 minutes afterward. And Robert Downey Jr...is so hot, and he knows it. I find this equal parts obnoxious and fantastic. I'd watch his narcissistic documentary, much to my probable dismay. I adore Christopher Plummer. Angelina Jolie is just weird. Billy Crystal is boring, not funny. Cirque du soleil was cool. Meryl Streep is so freaking fantastic. 

Uh...I'm much nicer than I used to be. But I still say stupid stuff in the out-loud fashion I'm desperately trying to avoid in my quest to practice the art of "just because it's true doesn't mean you should say it."

This confession probably doesn't negate my blonde comment.

For the record: my bed is my favorite material possession, though it comes in close contest with my snowboard. If it wasn't weird and fairly unwarranted, I'd take a picture of it and frame it and...I don't know...find some other way to show my gratitude for it. I don't know how or why that shows my love and devotion for a mattress, or why that's a thing I should write, but I did say something about my inability to form cohesive sentences lately, right? Somewhere at the beginning of this post? I just think this is probably how people feel about someone they love...can't wait to see them again, don't want to leave them...my sentiments exactly.

I have nothing else to say about any of this. 

Because I need a nap.

I shall write whatever portion of a sentence I please. 

It's such a good thing I posted today. Lives were changed.