On a scale of 1 to Marginally Entertaining, I'd give it a letter grade instead.

Dear DeeAura: 
Your blog has been boring lately, and I don't even come here to read it anymore because you write about nothinggggggguuuuhhh. 
Sincerely, 
the people who might have read this, had you written something worthwhile.


I know. 


What? You wanna know about my life lately? What deep thing I've been thinking about since the last weird thing life decided to throw at me?

Huh. Too bad. I stopped all my deep thinking in late April. :) Best idea I've ever had.

...probably...

And then I started singing in this little thing called the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

Goodbye, life.

...which is so sad because facebook makes my life look like it used to be UH-MAZING.

bahaha. But no longer! These are the kinds of things showing up for all the facebook people who care these days:

This would be after at least a week of no sleep because my days included ONLY work, recording week for MoTab, and commuting. 

It was also a day after the world's worst date, and just hours before the world's most offensively boring dinner with boys who should be men by this time in their lives.

Good heavens, people. All I'm asking for is a good joke every now and again!

Ayeyaeyae. I was not created to function on this level. 

Heck no.

It's like I've been absent from my own life. 

UNACCEPTABLE.

Even the sweet special needs girl in my ward demanded to know where I've been lately as I managed to get to institute last night for the first time in...at least six weeks.

See, and then I was just too tired to explain to her that I've been around. Sort of. So I just promised her I'd do better.

THEN I try talking to guys at normal social events, and what happens?
I'm a total idiot.
There's no explanation available.
Somewhere along the way, I lost my ability to communicate verbally, let alone flirt or be witty.
I am thriving on awkwardness these days.

...which is fantastic, especially if I plan on sitting in my room watching 30 Rock for the rest of my life.

I just spent more than the acceptable 2.5 seconds actually considering what that would be like.

So anyway, then on a quick break from spreadsheets at work today (you covet my life, I know) I read through some some blog drafts lately, and this is what I found:


Reasons I should be grounded today:

Apparently I think speeding on the freeway isn't cause for getting a ticket from the crazy bad-A highway patrolman on a mission to save the world last night. Not sure why I didn't think that was gonna happen...and this will definitely cause me the most pain while I'm in Hawaii in August and can't buy that useless thing I wanted because I thought getting to the last night of MoTab choir school on time was such a BIG FRIGGIN' DEAL.


I haven't put my clothes away for three days straight.


Actually, that's a lie, because it's probably been four days. FOUR DAYS.


Just because I'm an adult doesn't mean I don't have to be responsible. FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!


My purse is a giant disaster. It has Mary Poppins capabilities, but there's really no excuse for the unadulterated chaos found within.


I'd go on and elaborate further, but then this post would turn legitimate instead of just being ridiculous. 

That was from the end of April.

Aaand this is my only excuse for not blogging.

I'll be back as soon as I have something cool, or marginally funny to report.

Go on, get along with your wildly entertaining lives already.

This message brought to you by weird BYU food, sleeping past alarm clock snooze allowance, and probably some other stuff I can't articulate because I lack verbal prowess in this moment.

How to discover what you REALLY want:

I recommend searching the ksl classifieds on an average of about once a month. One man's trash, another man's treasure, right?

Only...today as I was diligently searching for a free/cheap sweet piano on ksl, (because I finally decided it's ridiculous to not have one, but I need a pretty sweet keyboard so I don't have to hire a team of muscly men to move my legit piano every time I move, since I tend to do that pretty often. On the other hand...hello tangent...maybe I SHOULD take every excuse to have man muscle in my life. Huh. Anyway.) I somehow got sidetracked by an ad for a bicycle.

And now my world is completely changed. Uh, how am I supposed to decide between road bike, mountain bike, or beach cruiser? I mean, okay, I don't live by a beach, but how cute are THOSE bikes? But a road bike would be sweet for some summer morning rides. But I grew up riding mountain bikes, and there's something about that extreme tread on my bike that just makes me feel a little more awesome. Maybe I need all those kinds of bikes.

And a sweet piano. 

And I think I want both of those for basically free so I can still save for Hawaii in August. 

And I also want to go on a Vegas roadtrip to visit my rockstar friend Celine Dion because we've just had a long-distance relationship our whole lives and I feel like it's time to put a stop to that. 

Oh, and while we're at it, I would also like an extra Saturday each week wherein I may do whatsoever I please.

That's all.